Denver: City of Cute Dogs and Weed

So now that I got all my end of the world complaining out of my system, let’s talk about Denver. I can see why people move from all over the country to live there.

  1. Surrounded by mountains
  2. Great weather
  3. Cool things to spend money on, like:

    Food (gourmet strawberry Pop Tart)

    Coffee (look at all the twisty drip action)

    DIY shit (colorful ramekins)

    (cutest measuring spoons)
  4. Super bike friendly (motor vehicle-free bike paths that cut through the middle of town)

We stayed with Clint in a two-story house that used to be a church. It was right across the street from Section 8 housing, and the convenience store across the street got tagged big time the first night we stayed there. That being said, it was still a friendly little neighborhood and felt safe enough. Clint lives with four other early twenty-somethings, all of them from Florida. I think all of them are from Palmetto, actually. That’s the town Travis and Clint grew up in, just south of Tampa. And let me tell you, these kids are repping Florida pretty damn hard. Those shorts!

To my great happiness, there were three adorable animals residing in this house: Professor McGonagall, Luna, and Roxy. The Professor was a cat and spent her time outside challenging squirrels to deathly fence-walking face-offs. Luna is quite possibly the cutest dog we met on the trip, and she was the perfect size and expert cuddler.

Then there was Roxy.
Roxy was a rescue dog and still had issues. She barked maniacally when anyone entered the house, even the people who had lived with her for years. We soon discovered, however, that the best way to make Roxy’s attentions toward you turn favorable was to start petting Luna. Then Roxy would just leap up in your lap no problem. Not gonna lie, I empathize with the small neurotic dogs most.

Two of the housemates work at Starbucks, which turns the fridge, countertops, and coffee area into a home Starbucks bistro. Need that morning pick-me-up? Each of them gets a pound of coffee to take home every week. Return from the bar feeling peckish? It’s cool, would you like a brownie, a cheese danish, or scones? Can’t figure out what you want for a mid-day snack? You have regular and greek yogurt parfaits to choose from.

One more thing about this house. These kids smoke weed. Like they reeeeally smoke weed. Like when you turn on Netflix on the flat screen you have the push three bongs out of the way. Like every morning is a wake and bake kind of morning. Like I even learned about a new way to smoke weed.

Doing “dabs” is a way to smoke a bowl’s worth of THC in one hit. You buy this weed oil… I don’t know what it’s called or where you get it. Then you get this special bong bowl and heat it up with a crème brulee torch till it’s glowing red hot. Then you use a metal instrument to dab the weed oil into the glowing bowl and inhale. These veteran stoners told us sometimes it’s better to do this at night because you may as well plan on being stoned for the next 8 hours. These kids get so excited about dabs that they started chanting and clapping their hands about it when Taylor suggested that’s how they spend their Friday afternoon. “Dabs! Dabs! Dabs!” Apparently, dabs are the bomb.

So that’s one thing about this legal marijuana thing. Weed is very high quality, easy to obtain, and cheap. You can buy it for about half the price as you would in other places. But luckily, marijuana isn’t the kind of drug that makes you want to hit your girlfriend (alcohol) or allows for easy overdose (prescription drugs). Clint’s roommates all have jobs, even jobs that require them to be at work at 3am and 6am. Colorado is opening up huge tax revenues with their legal dispensaries. Marijuana bought legally is taxed 25%, and is only bought from certified producers, which are highly regulated. Not that the black market isn’t alive and well, but as I said, everyone still seems to be functioning.